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So in a predetorial society. . all cities. . self love (that we are entitled to positive dreams/realities) is what everyone is fighting over. . .


In my very unusual situation, where there is no interaction
the energy is saved thank God.



Need and attempt to inspire need (spiritual assault) are rampant outside.
but a man is not judged by input- only by output.
and all blinds are closed. .. i did slip outside for a 20 minutes (a mistake) last night, but overall haven't left studio for 2 months.

So energy has no where else to go. . . it cant turn into need (minus love), because there are no people around to accept what would be a forced into (and willing according to the basic energy laws even if I didn't realize it consciously) gift of my life drops to them. This would appear as a coincidence, illness, accident, etc, but far from coincidence. this is what would happen with negative contact- in a city you are assaulted, convinced you don't deserve $200 of life energy that day and instead it should be spent on exercise equipment and slim fast.

But in drug rehab center, or secure studio, or bunker, where you have no vehicles for your needs. . the demons cant touch you. . you have all this energy that cant be wasted, and suddenly you can write poetry or whatever.


So God and beauty exists in the attack as well, for it is also this which is contributing to the energy in the awareness of this evening, writing now, and ultimately propelling me towards paradise island.

The dance between 1 and 0

All paradise that results from human interaction is a both because of and spite of this interaction.

I achieve island paradise at the last possible moment before the Israeli people kill me.. . the situation now is beautiful, but the human body is not infinite- limited by the amount of stress it can take. So sitting in this closed environment, i am being assaulted but not answering.
If i go outside, pick up the phone, or even open my blinds for a second and glance outside, this accumulate energy escapes , and drains from me in the form of loss of self love, which is the result of social assault (and indeed what they are fighting for )
Very minor amounts does escape every time I listen to a car passing or neighbor closing door, but in reality I'm not replying. And the attempt to force a reply - or steal energy is an assault that ultimately creates more positive energy.

A child grows up and in the even of achieving nirvana it is both because of and in spite of parents, and all others. all interaction by all people is elements of 1 and 0 - love but also attempts to kill you.


Of course the only way for this energy to escape is through self destruction


So naturally in the beginning of tonightıs grokking i was scratching my head as awareness was blinding me, but i curled up under my down comforter, and this was reduced.


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Basically there are many variations of how to approach the x y z equation, and there are those who place an emphasis on each of the 3. I shoot towards awareness to force love. . . some shoot for love. . some aim for the balls and try to force need (an an attractive but dangerous woman might try this)


Get love- give love (making love)
Give love and get love as a result, more give more receive
Give need, get need (drug dealer, go to prison- lack of freedom=need)
Give awareness, get awareness (a discussion, in a loving way about origins of universe, both writer and reader, or both sides of conversation end up more enlightened in process)

This is not rational as much as the law of infinite energy. . it is because all 1 and 0 are making love and

(I'm in a closed system. . if they give me need, but i cant give anyone else need, so this energy turns into 1)
this only is beautiful as long

Long live all hermits. . . i will hopefully stay like this until get to island or find Ethiopian Woman. of course couldn't find her because they don't let me find anything (find= massive reduction of desire) I'm in a situation where not free. . a woman is a product of a society, and cannot find a woman when the balance is off and the society is no acceptance. . unless there is a miracle. i predict that when i leave her, i will suddenly be able to. all time that here that haven't found her makes it more difficult. . like spiritual constipation

Thank God all other missions have been accomplished. . by bypassing all interaction with outside.
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Origin of universe- we must first dispel all western notions of God and the devil. Otherwise this is scary (in fact one of my first thoughts scared me as well, as western indoctronization is in me as well - God couldn't possibly be making love to the devil. . because devil doesn't exist. . but a yin and yang are certainly making love.



Questions now answered:
Why is there evil?
Origin and meaning of universe
Mechanism of good person
Mechanism of bad person
The beauty of all things in the universe- all is God - even those that try to kill us are beautiful- they are giving us life, make use stronger, etc
Why cities battle over (self) love (not able to conceive its true nature - that is infinite. animalistic nature assumes all resources must be fought over and defended, that they are finite. increase for one must mean decrease for other.





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